hoping for a miracle

i only have three uncles and all of them are great. i have good memories of doing stuff with them during my childhood, but one uncle was a little extra special! bob is my mom's oldest brother but he is a big kid - always has been and always will be! my family moved all around the country when i was growing up (military brats) but we would come visit at least every summer. when we would visit uncle bob, he would always take us (my brother and me) to do fun kid stuff. the funny thing was, i don't think he did it just to be nice - he actually enjoyed himself too. he would take us to eat at fun restaurants and he took us to see "howard the duck" and "ghostbusters" and other classic movies! looking back on it as an adult now, it sounds like it would be torture for him but if he didn't like it, he never let on! he taught me how to dive in his pool - and not just once but every year! somehow, every summer i would come back and couldn't remember how to do it and he would patiently teach me all over again like it was the first time. (by the way, i need another lesson, i can't dive anymore)! he would turn up the music loud in his car so we could "jam" and at home he would crank up the music and we would dance. our favorite dance to watch him do was when he would fall on the floor and do "the worm" and "the dead bug"!! his son wasn't born until i was a teenager but even when he had his own son, he still gave us lots of attention and wanted to do fun things with us while we were there. unfortunately, now he is in a very hard battle with anaplastic thyroid cancer. this type of cancer has a 10% survival rate and he now has a tumor in his bone in his leg and one in his lung. the tumor in his lung has doubled in size even though he has been on chemo and an experimental drug. so this week he had to be admitted to the hospital again for a transfusion. through all of this, he still remains positive and upbeat. i've seen him 3 or 4 times since his battle with cancer began and he is always in a good mood and still cracking jokes. he says he feels great! i'm not delusional, but i do remain hopeful. miracles DO happen so why couldn't my uncle beating cancer be another one?!

what a difference a year makes

the kindergartner (who I guess from now on will be called "the first grader") finished kindergarten yesterday! i can't get over how much she has changed in a year (things she likes and dislikes, her personality and what all she has learned)! she used to be such a girlie-girl (she is no longer into princesses, doesn't want to wear dresses all of the time and now loves to pick up bugs and get dirty). last year in preschool, she didn't even like to be anywhere around boys (even as friends) and she is now boy crazy. especially over one certain boy who she says she loves and is going to marry him!!! she is such a flirt (and she definitely didn't get that from me), but she also just hangs out and plays with the boys (that was me). she is so much more outgoing now and has so much attitude (which is good and bad)! and although she has always been smart (not that i'm biased or anything), she has learned so much more this year! her computer skills have gotten even better, she's learned a lot more spanish and does really well at math (the hubby says she got that from me)! she is reading everything (not always a good thing) and writes so well (one of my friends says my daughter's handwriting is better than her daughter's handwriting and she is 4 years older). i also love that she reads stories to her sister now!

i was shocked (and happy) that she didn't cry when she had to leave her friends and her teacher. the good thing is that she is coming back to the same school next year and almost all of the kids are coming back too. while she won't have her wonderful teacher again next year, she will still be able to see her in the halls and at lunch everyday. while kindergarten may not seem like much, it is very important to giving a child a strong base to a lifelong enjoyment of learning and i couldn't have asked for her to have a better kindergarten teacher. it was a really great school year (but now i am glad to have the summer off)!

somewhere over the rainbow

today was the kindergartner's talent show. all 6 of the girls in her class did a dance to hannah montana's "let's get crazy". it was really cute and she did great! i really think she has a natural ability to "shake her groove thing" (haven't decided if this is a good thing or a bad thing yet)! after the talent show, the administration presented awards and the kindergartner got perfect attendance and the godly character award for faithfulness! we were both very pleased. after the awards presentation, the kindergarten class had a luncheon for all of the parents of the class. the theme was "somewhere over the rainbow" and the idea was to let the students show off some of the things they learned over the year. as "pseudo-room mom", i planned the menu and prepared all of the food. we had a rainbow vegetable tray, a rainbow fruit tray and 4 pizzas (cut in half to look like rainbows). i painted the kids hands and we made a rainbow out of their handprints. it turned out really well!

the end is near

i am almost done watching my "weekday baby" - only two and a half more days next week! (not that i'm counting or anything). her dad is a teacher so he will be with her for the summer and i have given them my resignation for the next school year. it will be nice to have a year of just being alone with my little one everyday. i was alone with the kindergartner everyday for the first 3 years of her life! i recently realized that i have been changing diapers almost everyday for 5 years and 11 months now!! i need a break from kids! maybe the hubby and i will plan for an overnight getaway because i am stressed out from kid crap! refereeing fights, picking up the same things over and over, repeating myself over and over, "i'm hungry", "i'm thirsty", "can so-and-so come over to play", "where is such-and-such", etc. and the sad thing is, the summer hasn't even started yet! i'm also stressed out because i have so much to do before the end of the school year, i've started a massive list of projects that have to be done this summer and i think my thyroid and hemochromatosis problems are acting up. that's it, i'm definitely planning a mini-vacation!

missing my kitty-dog

it's been a month since my kitty-dog had to be put to sleep. i can't let kitty go without reminiscing about her life a little - after all, she was my first baby!

in the 12 and a half years that she has been a member of this family, we have gone through so much with her! as a puppy, she was CRAZY!! she tore up rugs, stole food off of the counter and even ate a book (that i borrowed from my boss) on how to train your dog! :-) she had to stay in a crate in my apartment during the day while i was at work - i did come home for lunch everyday. at night, she had so much energy and would run laps (at warp speed) through my apartment. i moved from my apartment and rented a house because i knew she needed a yard. not even a month after we moved there, she got parvo from the dogs next door and it nearly killed her! how ironic that the reason i got a house was for her to have a yard and the yard would be the thing that almost killed her! i spent thousands to get her through that (i.v.'s, medication, extended hospital stay, etc.) but i wasn't going to let her die. on the upside, the was so much calmer when she came back from her "near-death experience". about a year later, brent and i went out of town and a friend fed and took care of my dogs (i also had a black lab/rottweiler named "scooter"). while that friend was watching them, the dogs got out and scooter didn't go far before he was found, but kitty was missing for over a week! someone that saw our signs called and said they had seen her miles from my house on a very busy road. my friend told me that he had "a better chance of dating pamela anderson than i had of getting my dog back"!! side note: he and pamela are very happy together right now. :-) finally, a family called and when i got kitty back she was perfect! i had birthday parties for her (with doggie ice cream) and she had her own stocking at christmas. in the last few years, she had a tumor on her eye and we had it removed but it came back so we had to have her entire eye removed! how fitting that we named our dog kitty because they say cats have nine lives and she definitely did!

the girls talk about missing her and that they still love her almost every day. my little one said "i wish kitty was here but i still love her". my floors get so dirty now - i'm used to not having to pick up food when it falls on the floor. in her younger days, the food barely had time to bounce one time before kitty ran over and ate it! when i go to bed at night, i still look for her on the floor by my side of the bed so i don't step on her. the only good thing i can say about kitty not being here anymore is that we don't have to pick up clumps of dog hair, but i'd gladly do that again to have her back!

happy birthday, little one!

my little one is not so little anymore - today she is 3 years old! it's pretty much a typical monday around here - hubby's at work, the kindergartner is at school and i'm watching my weekday baby but i am still trying to make it a special day for my little one. the local news showed her picture and wished her a happy birthday this morning, after dropping the kindergartner off at school we went to chick-fil-a (her absolute favorite) and got some chicken and fries for lunch. we would have gone there at lunchtime but that is right in the middle of weekday baby's naptime. i'm hoping to take her to the park later but right now it is raining and yucky. tonight we are going to my parents house for a fish fry and birthday cake - yum! happy birthday, sweet little one (and even if you are getting older, you will still be my baby forever)!

p.s. to "happy mother's day" post

i'm seriously about to cry right now! i just got to thinking about how my little one is no longer a baby! by the time the kindergartner turned 3, i had already had 2 miscarriages and had given birth to my little one! i think my little one's third birthday is almost hitting me harder than my 30th birthday hit me (and that was not good)!!